70- SHAVING MY CAT
During that time I was young and I was also upset, but that is not an excuse. The couple had not been noticeably slow in the head but when I went over to borrow the clipper's I got the impression that they both were a little younger than I, even though they both physically looked older. (they were older)
Not even 10 minutes later there had been another knock on the door. I had thought that it was one or both of the neighbors again and they were back to check on the cat. I don't remember what I had yelled out but I know me, it was a smart assed comment that was probably about killing the cat.
I remember that the knock was repeated and the knock was followed by a gruff voice that told me that it had been the Police. I remember looking wide-eyed at my friend who had returned the same or very similar look. He tossed the cat (not really) and quickly hid the beers behind the couch. I had rolled to the door and answered it.
Ansonia, Ohio had been a small town with 2 cop cars and 2 cops and 1 Police Chief and the occasional Trooper or Sheriff that was passing through would answer the call. Fortunately for me one of the town cops answered the call. (The State Troopers were the worst but I will tell you about my experience with them later.)
The first words that came out of his mouth were in the form of a command. He had demanded that I get the cat and show it to him. He stayed standing in the hall and I could see that the couple had their front door open a crack. Hope it was nice and entertaining for them.
My friend handed me the cat and I held it while the officer quickly looked the cat over. Then he had pulled out a clipboard that must have been under his arm, He had told me that the way the cat looked was not what he expected to see when he had gotten there as the cat was purring and was not in a panic . (When he had first gotten what ever call they announced over the police band, he had probably thought that we were Satan worshippers or something and maybe we were drinking the cats blood. When he had knocked on the door maybe he thought that I would answer the door without a shirt on and have weird symbols drawn on my chest with cat blood. The cat would be laying limply in my arms and her head would be swinging loosely in response to every movement that I made with my upper body. We would have a circle drawn out on the floor and there would be lit candles all around the room. Of course I would be speaking to him in tongues and HANSON would be blaring on the stereo, mmm bop fucking neighbors. )
He told me that he had to write me a warning and it would be considered Animal Cruelty if they had been called out to respond to anything like that again and I would be charged, have a fine and may lose the animal. He had suggested that I take the animal to the vet the next time that I wanted to get her fur trimmed.
The warning has since then expired an has been taken off my record. I have 1 cat now but when I find a hair on a plate or something, I get the urge......... But my cat shaving days are over.
No comments:
Post a Comment