ROB"S BOMB SHELL

 #??  -ROB"S BOMB SHELL

I had not seen or even spoken to Rob in a few months so I decided to give him a call.  Every time I had  called his house he was never there so I was constantly leaving messages on his answering machine. One day when I had called his wife had answered the phone and I asked her to please have him call me when he came home.  That night came and went with no calls and that pissed me off! A few days went by and then I called his house again and got the answering machine.

When you no longer have a job and no car to go anywhere you have a lot of time to think about things and replay the events of better days and what you would and should have done.  I know I had thought back to a few days earlier when I had a kick-ass car and a job.

The Camero, I would not have  had the steering wheel adapter fall off  if I would just have taken it in to the shop for the annual routine inspection. Why didn't I take it in, WHY? I could feel it coming loose. I should have taken it in. I had not had the time as they were only open during the week  and I always had appointments and physical therapy at my gym. The shop had been in the down town area and the traffic had always been a mess,the other shop had been way over in Ocala. I had  felt confident when driving that car especially when I had just washed it and the rims were shined up and the  T-tops were out...Man, was I loving life!

The job and speaking of job In reality it was a dead-end. I was not going to advance, shit I could never  even hope to get full time. The company  (which I can't name here cause it could harm the chances of doing business with by selling my books through.) Had been  and is to fucking cheap in awarding full time to associates. The main manager had finally made it clear to me that I was never going to be a department manager cause I could not reach the top shelf and the requirements (that I was informed were not going to be bent) for a department manager are to be able to do all the work that is expected of the workers in your department. The job had the promise of taking me no where.

I can buy another Camero  later on down the road  but that Camero was special.  Rob went with me to find it and he had seen the car first and had pointed it out to me.  I had seen the car and though that it was way nicer than anything that I would ever be able to afford. He put down the down payment for me and said that he would cover my car insurance for me until I found a job. The gesture of helping me get the car meant a lot  but this had been  about more than an awesome car. The reason why I did not have my drivers license was because I did not have the hand controls that I needed to operate a motor   vehicle and getting a hold of those hand controls is not easy.  I had to go and get a physical and obtain a doctor's note and then I had to present that note to an authorized dealer of the hand controls. The controls (only two) ran me almost a thousand dollars after installation.  Once the controls were installed I had to meet the requirements of operating those controls, which was not to hard. I just had to have so many hours using that equipment before I was allowed to attempt to get my license.  For this, Rob rode with me.  I remember that on one occasion when I was driving I had noticed something, something that had been real. My dad was teaching me to drive on those  Florida roads  but   my Dad was teaching me, his son (Debatable, but read on) how to drive.  Sure I was almost 23yrs old but what if I was 16 again and he was there teaching his son how to drive.  The feeling was brief but I will remember it forever.  That is what I miss most about the Camero that I no longer had  and I feel like the wrecked had ruined the bond between him and I.

I had left a message on his answering machine telling him that I was not going to do all the work at trying to get to know him and that he had to call me as well if we had any hopes of getting to know each other as father and son.  I  had  then asked him to give me a call.  Of course, days went by with no phone call and   then 4 days later he called me up and told me that he wanted to talk to me about something and  he was going to come by and check out my new place.  We both had agreed that he would come over in a few days.

It had been  August 8, 2007 and  Rob pulled up in a brand new mustang and got out holding a case of beer under his arm.  I was on my deck and I waved him up the ramp, noticing that he had a smile on his face.  He entered my trailer and leaned down to give me a one armed hug and then turned to place the case of beer that he was holding in the other arm  in the fridge,   he had given  me one of the beers and kept 1 for himself and then sat down on my couch.  ( Which I slept on cause I did not yet have a bed. )
He told me that it was good to see me and that he needed to talk to me about something important,  he began by telling me that he did get my messages but he was busy with other things that were going on in his life.  Not only was he putting up with problems at work  but, he was also worried about his marriage not working out and dealing with a worry that he had about me.  He told me that he did not plan on talking to me about this but his wife had told him that this was something that I had needed to know about.......

He began by telling me that my father had gotten out of prison earlier that day and  he paused for a moment and I am glad he did cause it took me a moment to analyze what I was not sure that I had just heard him say. He continued by telling me that when he had seen me at the airport for the first time  he had thought that I looked just like his best friend that he had when he was stationed on the same base with Delores.  He told me that he did not think that I was his son,  at that  point I had  not even been looking at him.   I began taking larger and larger drinks from the bottle until it had been  empty and  Rob stood up and went and got me another beer  then sat back down to tell me what had happened.

They had gotten  married and then were constantly fighting and one night when  Rob stormed out, Delores called his best friend and fucked him to hurt  Rob.  Then  he  had told me that right after that  had happened  she had been  pregnant.   He had told me that he doubted that I was his son  long before I was born and they had found out something  had been wrong with me   plus he said that was why he did not pay any child support until the courts made him. (His wife and her daughter and son both knew of  Rob's doubts. This made sense to me cause on a few occasions when his wife had gotten mad at me  the woman pointed out that she wanted to say something but Rob would not let her.)

 He stood up and told me that he was going to go out on my front deck to smoke a cigarette  and I had went out on the deck with him to finish our conversation and  he asked me if I would mind going for a blood test so that we could see if he was my dad.   I told him that I wanted to find out and that I would do it and  then I remember asking him what he wanted the results to be and he looked at me and told me that he would be my friend.   I swallowed the last of my unknown tears at that moment.  My parents , well the people that fucked and had me were  both out of the loop as I was officially fighting this battle on my own.

He told me that he was going to head out but he was going to leave the beer with me cause he knew that I had a lot to think about before he had shaken  my hand and told me that he would give me a call and then he went and got in the mustang and left.

I went in and called Delores  because I had a lot to ask her about , I asked her if she knew who (his name)  had been.    She asked me how I knew about him and I told her that  Rob had told me about the ordeal and She had said that  Rob knew that he was my father and then she told me her side of the story...

 Rob and her were always arguing and one day he was mad and did something that a husband should never do to his wife  ( she would not tell me what he had done.) She had told me that what he had done was horrible and so she slept with his best friend because she wanted to hurt him.

I had asked her if  Rob was my father and she told me that she thought so. (After all that he had done for me and how he helped me since I had moved to Florida in late 2004, I owe him a big thank you if he is not my father. But if he is, I would rather never talk to him again after the way he had deserted me.)    The bottom line was that Delores was a States away  and she had hurt me again.

   She tried to lie to me by telling me that she had mentioned the other guy to me before, even tho she hadn't but she had not been done yet as she  went as far as putting my little sister on the phone to back her up. They both tried lying to me.   LYING BITCHES!!!!!!!!!

   Of course  Rob did not call and even to this day, no blood test.  I know where the other guy lives but I do not plan on ever contacting him.